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  • Debbie Howell

Setting Limits vs Not Setting Limits

“We set limits and risk losing a relationship”


“We don’t set limits and remain a prisoner to the wishes of another”


The quotes above from the book “Boundaries” reveal the truth about the struggle of setting limits.  I think a lot of people choose not to set healthy boundaries because they are afraid of losing relationships.  Even if their relationships are dysfunctional it’s their “normal” and anything outside of that can incite fear.


The truth is, learning to set healthy boundaries can feel uncomfortable, even awkward to someone who has lived years without them.  There may be resistance from people in your life you when set about to make this positive change.  The thing to focus on is how much your life will improve as you take these steps.  No one should allow themselves to be controlled by another person.  God never intended relationships to be that way.  The longer you’ve lived in unhealthy relationships the more help and support you will need to make the change.


“Boundaries” communicates that on page 66, “No matter how much you talk to yourself, read, study, or practice, you can’t develop or set boundaries apart from supportive relationships with God and others.”


I praise God for His wisdom and for blessing my life with godly support as I continue to make the choices that will lead to healthy boundaries.  I pray that if you don’t have that type of support, God will bring it into your life.


May our lives be “rooted and established in love.”  (Ephesians 3:17)

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